Mac Miller Grooves into Adulthood with “Swimming”

After catapulting into new visibility in 2016 with the announcement of his relationship with pop star Ariana Grande, fans find Mac Miller finding his way in the wake of their break up. “Swimming”, his fifth studio LP, is Miller at his most mature. “Swimming” is a tale of love lived then lost and of identity after being pushed into discovery by circumstance.  

“It’s not that unique,” he tells Zane Lowe of Beats 1 Radio. “I was in love with somebody. We were together for two years. We worked through good times, bad times, stress and everything else, and then it came to an end. And we both moved on. It’s that simple,” Miller says. 

For better or worst, heartbreak changes a person. For Miller, it’s been the catalyst to his journey of self-acceptance. Opening with soft guitar strums and scenic melodies, Miller spends the first half of “Swimming” exploring the ways in which he’s changed.

“My regrets look just like texts I shouldn’t send,” he sings on opening track “Come Back to Earth”.

Then quickly, the tempo picks up with “Hurt Feelings”. Here Miller acknowledges that despite his urging not to, he’s changed. In changing, Miller is understanding the larger world and how his obstacles have shaped his life. As “Swimming” cycles through tracks 3 and 4, “What’s the Use” and “Perfecto”, it becomes evident that this album is as much about Miller’s self-journey as it is an open letter attempt at processing the loss of his relationship with Grande. While we’ll never know the inner workings of their relationship (and we shouldn’t), “Perfecto” and “Dunno” hint at its imperfection.  

After the break-up, Miller unplugged from the digital world. 

 “…It all just seemed unimportant. …So, when all the press happened with the break up and the DUI…with everything that happened, it was just too much. I’m looking on the internet and I’m like I already have my own feelings and emotions and thoughts about what I went through so why the fuck am I going to have room for all of these? Like how am I going to have room for that? So, I completely cut it out,” Miller tells Zane Lowe of Beats 1 Radio. 

Miller unplugging has yielded a maturation unheard in his previous projects. Typically, in life after love, there is a hero and a villain in the recounts, and most tend to subdue their pain behind bravado or humor. For once, Miller has chosen neither. Instead, he’s opted to tell his truths without the veil of self-deprecating humor or an alter persona. “Swimming” is Miller at his rawest. He’s sad, he’s happy and he’s still figuring out who Malcolm is. 

However, on “Conversation, Pt. 1” and “What’s the Use” Miller does use a touch of bravado to relish in his maturation. He’s reached new heights in stability and self-acceptance. He’s made money, making good on the promise he made to homies to keep everyone fed, but even more that’s not enough for him. Miller is letting go of what he thought he needed and the new freedom is scary. 

“…I’ve been all over the place man, like I’ve tried it all,” says Miller to Zane Lowe on Beats 1 Radio. “The real addiction and the real self-destruction has always come from creating. You know? Just because like that’s where I put all my energy. And that has taken so much space in my brain that in the past I hadn’t left room for like an actual life to be happening. It was all just making music all the time…,” he tells Lowe. 

“Self-care” is an ode to Miller making room for life. Songs like “Jet Fuel” and “2009” show Miller expanding in the space he’s created for living life as he reflects on self-doubt, isolation, and personal peace.

“2009” is particularly telling because he’s reflecting from the starting point of his stardom. Since 2009, Miller’s grown to be a multi-million-dollar artist. He’s spent years creating in a substance fueled mania and seemingly avoiding acceptance of his new life. Now, he’s a man grappling with where his life has led him.  

 “To me, I’m like okay…I’m just talking about things that I’m proud of myself for, things I’m afraid of or things that are just thoughts and emotions and I’m like why is this interesting?” he ponders during his interview with Zane Lowe of Beats 1 Radio. 

Miller has built a career on personality and talent, but largely on his willingness to be candid about the various life stages he’s experienced. Miller, like countless other creatives, seems to have forgotten the strength in infusing work with his lived experiences. There’s nobility in transparency, so whether Miller thinks that makes him interesting, it does. 

 “Swimming” is Mac Miller after a major life shift. The album is a testament to letting go and no longer being bound to labels or lifestyles shed. It is the bookend to a past season and the introduction to his new life. So, as the 26-year-old grounds himself in Malcolm, he’s free. Here Miller sits in the thick of himself and embraces the melancholy that laces his joy. Yet, unlike previous life chapters, Miller desire to keep his head above water. He’s choosing life.